healing process.

ladybird according to someone, it's a luck charm.to english peeps la.malaysian i donno.so..that day i decided to try another kind of treatment, there's this yellow ladybird dat stuck to my shirt.lucky aye~the pic above is chocolate ladybird tat i found in my fridge. guess they belong to my bro.

i was talkin to some pakar in skin the other day. they introduced spirulina.this woman say it will take at most 4 months. WOW..2 months earlier than the previous treatment. my parents decided to give it a try la.10 days of consuming cost me rm609. just imagine what i can do with the money. more n more shopping..sigh. hmm..if it really gets better..i sempat celebrate my 21st birthday PERFECTLY. den i can throw PARTAY!!! woots...

i'm sooo happy today! my skin is drying up!!! THANK GOD! and da cream dat i fraustratedly baught yesterday.hehe..my dad loves me...wakakaka...my problem is his problem. can say dat my parents sacrificed alot dealing with my emotions. can't wait to repay them.

ok..once again..i gave in to my mouth. i went pasar malam. * i know i shouldn't tempt myself with street food* and i bought this 4 for 1.50 dimsum la. after makan.i feel one kind. WOW.after so long din take meat. my body can't stand pork anymore? hopefully i won't have strong desire for fast food n oily food la...since so long din take d.

i really hate the frame to my pics. how to delete it ar?

shopping brighten up the day after.

if not because of this piece (and some others that i lazy to snap), i would start my day 180 degree the other way.i can say that i didn't get enough sleep yesterday due to the stupid itch all over my body. and i guessed it la..in the morning it sting like hell.man i taste hell at such a young age.anyways,i went JJ yesterday. Jcard members' day. ajak my frens all turn me down. so, pathetically i jalan alone. i don't mind la actually. don't need to spend double the time there also la.coz saya single mar.JJ was packed giler la.but not as packed as i remembered. trolleys all over. no brain kar these ppl. bring trolley. tutup jalan only. i got 3 piece in JJ and cost me only rm65.37. sales up to 70%. i was thinkin to myself. if i don't need to buy cover ups, i think i will touch my ptptn money already. just now i have to be particularly sure of what i buy. i hope i don't shop like a spoil kid la.hmmph~*

oh btw, engine maths mmg "mati le aku". seriously speakin. this must be one of the worst paper.tikam not less than half. still don't have any idea how to do it AFTER the test. normally is like..." aiyah..it shud be done like this n that". not this paper tho. is kinda lucky its objective and kinda sick it's objective too. firstly, it's good coz, if i don't know anything, i still can tikam. the chances to obtain the correct answer is 1/4. however, it's sick sometimes coz there's no marks for working. but in this paper, i have no idea how to do it also la.
lesson learnt:
1) never have skin problem.
2) never skip tutorial class.
3) try my best to listen to sheila in the coming lectures.
4) gan chee seng said " don't take chapter 2 lightly".

since it's friday,jum sum up the week.
- i've been notice in class twice this week, not by any cun guy or classmates, but by lecturer+tutor.
first was by gan cheeseng. out of no where."MISS TEO, why u always look sleepy? u want to stretch? " i was thinkin. *sir i'm messy..i knoe..not sleepy"second was during engine maths tutorial. not only my body itchy, mouth also itch like anything. talk nonstop altho i know the tutor is looking. bagus kan. kena panggil answer question.in the midst of all the talkings,i popped out a question i even think God forgave me talking. i asked celine to come to church. hehe..on wed she said she'll think about it. today she sorta confirmed she wanna come. hopefully she comes..oh yea..joanne, another methodist gal, say wanna check out MGC. hopefully she comes too!..fuh.church byk perempuan chun dah~

- i wore baju kurung on tuesday.mom say i look sweet.thanks to mini flower prints.
altho many frens commented on how i combine my baju kurung and nike sneekers. a malay girl said i looked abit rocker with the sneekers,but one improvement. lilo said my batik bag match. syabas~

- went out with hema on wednesday to crash sushi king.2 bucks per plate. i was determined i wasn't gonna eat lot. " eh hema..i can't eat alot la" n guess how much is the bill.rm56.65.oh bagus.dat night was a nightmare. itchy ooo..i know..my bad..broke segala rules about eating.sigh..dissapointed in myself.then after makan we shop for bajus dat is on sale.

-went JJ shopping on thursday.Jcard day.oh spend money like water. now bank left 11 bucks.BANK! ELEVEN BUCKS. not tabung.i think the next time i shop is from BCB bank d.

-friday the 13th.i eat beehoon like no others. feels like beehoon-po d.dad bought bee hoon, mom cook bee hoon...

tomorrow the youth is taking over the childrens hour. hopefully i go.

i always imagine myself without skin problem.and it's killing me.

getting well.

the above pic is a few piece of rice crackers dat i eat with tomato paste. eat like dat boring la. i improvise myself.anyways it has been 5 days after emo post. a lil bit okay dee. tanks for the encouraging words guys.thanks for cheering me up.and tanks for the prayers.

i said i wanted to die in my previous post. ironically, when i was in my bro's speeding car, i remembered saying," kor i don't wanna die.even if with my skin like dat i don't wanna die." hmmph~~

this week is a super busy one. there's datelines to 1 lab report and 2 assigments. tomorrow is my engine maths paper. and i'm still blogging. sigh. tradition.blog before paper.

oh yea..i have friendster again. wow. friendster changed alot since i left. kinda lost now.so many things ooo....k la..if u want,u can add me at teoyenmei@yahoo.com. i have only 4 friends.3 to be exact.one is not even my friend.she's my cousin. tanks to livia. she forced me to create one.

engine maths. mati le aku.

i'm sick.

i'm currently pissed off at whatever that is happening to me. it's hard to be thankful and rejoice. i feel extremely weak nowadays. i don't wake up to a bright sunshine everyday. i don't dare to hope for a better tomorrow as i was always left disappointed.i hate the question how are u coz i can never answer i'm fine coz i am NEVER once fine in the past three years.THREE freakin years wasted!! how can i make my life meaningful ??u tell me!!!! i pray to God to give me strength every morning. sometimes i start my morning with pain n tears. it feels like HELL! i'm tired of not being able be happy 24/7. everyday is a challenge for me. i'm afraid i will backslide now as my faith is getting dimmer.i don't want to backslide!!!!...i'm just tired of being afraid n conscious all the time. "i wanna die" is the only three words that is frequently ringing in my mind.i'm mentally exhausted is all i can say.

i wish things will get better.tanks for the concern but i rather not talk about.don't bring this up if u don't wanna see me in tears. dat's how emo i am nowadays.so just shut it.

i feel better letting it out.

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